21.12.08
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Dear Kate,
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Hi, how are you? I hope everything is going well.Are you having a good time in Eilat? I'm sorry I haven't written in a while, I was busy with my school tests.
I want to tell you about something surprising that has happened to me in the summar.
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It happened on the eighth of August, on my birthday . I woke up and my parents congratulated me, then I went with my mother to the supermarket because I needed to buy things for my birthday party in the evening. When I got home from the supermarket I saw a letter from my friends Daria and Sara. When I read the letter I understood that they prepared a game for me. The game was a treasure hunt. I started to collect all the letters that they had written to me.
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Dear Kate,
.
Hi, how are you? I hope everything is going well.Are you having a good time in Eilat? I'm sorry I haven't written in a while, I was busy with my school tests.
I want to tell you about something surprising that has happened to me in the summar.
-
It happened on the eighth of August, on my birthday . I woke up and my parents congratulated me, then I went with my mother to the supermarket because I needed to buy things for my birthday party in the evening. When I got home from the supermarket I saw a letter from my friends Daria and Sara. When I read the letter I understood that they prepared a game for me. The game was a treasure hunt. I started to collect all the letters that they had written to me.
I went from my house to Daria's house, then to Sara's house and in the end I returned to my house and discovered that they had decorated my house with balloons and they gave me a present and a birthday card .
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It was a very fun birthday and I enjoyed so much to search for the letters on a treasure hunt. I hope that you enjoyed to read my letter. write soon. I want to know what you think about the surprise that my friends have made for me.
.
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It was a very fun birthday and I enjoyed so much to search for the letters on a treasure hunt. I hope that you enjoyed to read my letter. write soon. I want to know what you think about the surprise that my friends have made for me.
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Hope to see you soon,
Anastasia
Anastasia
תגובה 1:
Anastasia,
Firstly, I must to say you that your letter is very clear
and I enjoyed to read him.
The structured of the letter is organized well, but I think if you divide the second paragraph to two paragraph, it could be better than one long paragraph.
Additionally, your writing is very good and clear, and you have just some little mistakes.
This is all, I hope it help you, good luck.
Nofar.
הוסף רשומת תגובה